Lately I’ve been think a lot about how fragile life is. When you are young, you just can’t really seem to comprehend that ‘bad things’ can happen to you or that you too will die. It’s a reality that is so distant, you never think about it. And to be fair, when you are young…you don’t really know. Most things don’t have repercussions and none of them are really all that bad.
And I’d like to think most people think about this…not just myself. I remember when I was little sitting in the bathtub…crying…thinking about the fact that one day I wouldn’t be here and be with my mom. Remembering the house I was in, I couldn’t have been older than 6. And I remember that! That sinking feeling that one day all of this was going to be taken away and there was nothing I could do to stop it.
This is a feeling that has hit me hard throughout my entire life, and it’s one of the most paralyzing thoughts I have…other than those about losing people close to me…which is equally horrifying.
Look, this isn’t something I dwell on but it definitely crosses my mind, and I do believe it to be important. I believe it’s important to realize that we are mortal…and I truly feel that if we gave that more respect to it, that it would change so many things about what we do in this life.
People tell you all the time, you read quotes, but it never really changes does it? You still dwell, you’re still unkind, it all remains the same. So what gives? Why don’t we take that more seriously? Why don’t we realize that we don’t get forever? That one day none of this will matter, that we don’t matter. I don’t mean it like that; you matter…but you know what I mean.
I remember being on a flight to CA and it was magical for so many reasons. As we flew over the mountains, grand canyon, etc…I was looking down at the pines and I kept focusing on individual pines…thinking, how long has that been here? I mean…a hundred years? At least? And all of them…all of them have been here this long! And the grand canyon…how long it’s been here…the weather it has seen, the storms. It’s one of the wonders of the world………
And we think we matter? Do you see what I’m saying? These pieces of earth have seen and withstood things we don’t even know exist…and we sit here worrying about what people think of us. Do you see where I’m going with this?
Why don’t we spend more time worrying about what makes us happy…what we want…
We sure could, but we often don’t.